The Best of Friends

By Jim Hagarty
2017

So Donald Trump has an imaginary friend named Jim. He’s often referred to Jim when he is trying to make a case about something. For example, Jim used to go to Paris a lot with his wife but now considers it a hell hole because of all the Muslims that have been let in these past few years so now he steers clear.

No one has been able to get a precise bead on who exactly this Jim is and last week, some resourceful newshounds went through whole lists of people named Jim with whom Trump is associated. None of the Jims on the big long list fit the bill. Not even close. One Jim that might have made the grade isn’t married so could not have gone to Paris with his wife.

Apparently, making up friends is sort of a family tradition, as Papa Fred Trump did the same. He used to also pass himself off as someone other than who he really was, a little trick Donald adopted too, phoning news outlets posing as John Barron or John Miller and delivering the latest most amazing news about Donald Trump and the fantastic success he was having on the financial and romantic fronts.

Well, this is all fine and dandy, but I am here to burst the bubble. For, you see, I am the real Jim. The Donald and I go way back and are lifelong besties. He is right that I have not been to Paris in a while but he was wrong to say it was because of the Muslims who live there. The real impediment to my goals of strolling the wonderful streets of Paris is my lack of financial stability. To explain, I am a graduate of Trump University and that little venture cut into my assets.

However, I have forgiven my buddy Don and support him a hundred per cent. And I appreciate his continued support of me.

Don and Jim Forever!

Author: Jim Hagarty

I am a 65-year-old retired journalist, busy recovering from a lifelong career as an unretired journalist. This year marks a half century of my scratching out little fables about life. My interests include genealogy, humour and music. I live in a little blue shack in Canada and spend most of my time trying to stay out of trouble. I am not that good at it. I also spent years teaching journalism. Poor state of journalism today: My fault. I have a family I don't deserve, a dog that adores me, and two cars the junk yard refuses to accept. My prized possessions include my old guitar and a razor my Dad gave me when I was 14 and which I still use when I bother to shave. Oh, and my great-great-grandfather's blackthorn stick he brought from Ireland in the 1850s. I have only one opinion but it is a good one: People take too many showers.

1 thought on “The Best of Friends”

  1. Hang in there Jim….Don’s going to start another University in Paris….it’s going to be huuuuuuuge !

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