Talk and Text

By Jim Hagarty
2019
Ever since I bought a used iPhone a few years ago, I have noticed a strange thing happening when I send text messages. Every once in a while, my oversized fingers touch the wrong button and the bottom half of the screen is suddenly filled with this strange thing with a vavy line running through it. I’ve tried to ignore it and soldier on but it’s been a real pain. On Sunday, as I was texting a message, the random screen popped up again. This time, I was shocked to see words appearing at the end of my message that I hadn’t typed. “What the hell?” I asked, then was flabbergasted (my all-time favourite word) when the words “What the hell” appeared on my message. To test this out, I said a few more words: “This is just crazy.” Sure enough, they appeared in my message too. So, brave new world, here I come. Finally, I can give my stubby digits a rest and talk and text instead by tapping a microphone icon at the bottom of the screen. I just hope my editing skills are up to par and I don’t click send on a muttered remark such as, “Why does this silly person keep texting me?” or “I wish I could just ignore this idiot.” Mouth don’t fail me now!

Author: Jim Hagarty

I am a 72-year-old retired journalist, busy recovering from a lifelong career as an unretired journalist. This year marks a half century of my scratching out little fables about life. My interests include genealogy, humour and music. I live in a little blue shack in Canada and spend most of my time trying to stay out of trouble. I am not that good at it. I also spent years teaching journalism. Poor state of journalism today: My fault. I have a family I don't deserve, a dog that adores me, and two cars the junk yard refuses to accept. My prized possessions include my old guitar and a razor my Dad gave me when I was 14 and which I still use when I bother to shave. Oh, and my great-great-grandfather's blackthorn stick he brought from Ireland in the 1850s. I have only one opinion but it is a good one: People take too many showers.