You learn something new every day.
Please take note. The next time you sing for the residents of a nursing home, do not, I repeat, do not sing a fun (though gritty) song called Seven Old Ladies. Because everyone’s definition of fun is different, I guess.
Up to that point, doing my usual impersonation of a human jukebox, I was doing fantastically well and the audience loved me more than their own sons and daughters. However, as I sang Seven Old Ladies – a little ditty about seven aged senior citizens of the female persuasion who get stuck for a whole week in a public washroom – people in the audience started looking at me as though I was spray painting a box of kittens green.
And there was no getting them back after that. I am setting fire to the lyric sheet as I write.
As well, I am giving up the seniors’ home circuit, as every time I go to leave the building these days, now that I am 73 and look 93 (I was offered my first senior’s discount when I was 48), a staff member inevitably rushes over to stop me, thinking I am a resident trying to break out. Although not part of the home’s population, on that day, it was true I couldn’t get out of there fast enough.
I couldn’t shake the feeling that more than seven old ladies were chasing me!
©2013 Jim Hagarty
