I am keeping my eye on you!
My statistics tracking software gives me good information on not only how many “viewers” I have on this blog, but what posts exactly are attracting your eyeballs most often. Well, not yours specifically. All I have are raw numbers and that is all I want. I have little interest in your eyeballs, so you can relax. I quit optometry years ago.
It is gratifying to see the rising numbers of people who are spending time on Lifetime Sentences. Looking now and then at the stats gives me an idea of which of my posts are most popular. After almost four years at this now, I am developing a sense of what kinds of things will attract the most attention. Those nude photos of myself I posted a while ago were not well viewed, so I took them down. But who knows? Send me some of yourself and maybe they’ll have better luck.
The one area that very few people seem to be spending any time on (aside from your nudes) are the special sections I have listed at the top of every page and down in my sidebar. I just spent the afternoon going through all those special pages and updating them and I couldn’t get over how much stuff I have literally stuffed in them.
If you have have a few minutes now and then, have a look. There is lots of brilliant photography from my son Chris and my friend Al Bossence, as well as photos of classic cars and trucks, little jokes, a long treatise I wrote about geneaology, some philosphical ramblings and more. There’s a Corner Store where you can buy music and books, extremely accurate directions on how to get to my house, a place where you can donate your millions to me or at least leave me in your will, dozens of poems I have scribbled out and my original limericks by the basketful. For now, there is even the entire text of a humour book I published about being a stay-at-home dad (for now, because I may have to remove it to comply with terms of an Amazon deal where I am also publishing it) and some other things I am probably forgetting.
And by the way, you can also download apps on your phone which will give you ready access to everything. You can enjoy my stories as you are driving down the road!
If it isn’t yet clear to you that I am the literary equivalent of a mad scientist, I have started two new blogs that I will publish soon, the first at emigrantfamilyhomeagain.com and the second, with the very complicated address of jimhagarty.com. Maybe my nude selfies will have better luck on that last site. I will provide links to them on Lifetime Sentences when they are ready.
So, yeah, try to spend at least five hours a day on my blog and always remember: I’m watching you!
©2019 Jim Hagarty
